Week 9 Results – Fall of the Fall Champs

Real Deal must have been feeling the effects of their championship hangover as they fell 7-2 to Bayern Munich. Two new recruits were not enough as the Hulkamaniacs struggles continued. They fell 3-1 to The Gunners.

Real Deal vs Bayern Munich
To start the game all eyes (and Real Deal defenders) were on league-leading scorer RonalDuy. BM controlled the play but Real Deal’s tight marking didn’t allow many scoring chances. The shots that did slip through were easily handled by Kevin “The Wall” Bonner. But midway through the first half, Mario “Coach” Vega made a great inside cut to shed his man and rifled a low shot to the far corner to open the scoring for BM. The Real Deal knew they had to get that score back quickly because they know you cannot stop RonalDuy, you can only hope to contain him. “Menemen” Guler and Ivan “The Croatian Irritation” Gojmerac pushed up the field and despite some sustained pressure couldn’t quite crack the BM defence. This naturally left the Real Deal open to the counter-attack and RonalDuy potted another home to put BM up 2-0.

And what happened, then? Well, in Whoville they say
that Callahan’s small foot grew three sizes that day.
And then — the true meaning of Christmas came through,
and Callahan found the strength of ten Pauls, plus two!

Yes, Paul “I was left wide open on a set piece and a seeing-eye pass somehow managed to thread its way through the thicket of players to my golden foot and all I had to do was slam it home into a gaping net and then I wanted to say something really cool to piss off the goalie but I couldn’t because my brain stopped working due to the sheer amount of joy coursing through my veins so I just pointed my fingers as a single tear appeared out of the corner of my eye and rolled slowly down my cheek for my Christmas dream had come true and I knew that Santa was real because he heard my prayers and got my letter and I was a good good boy all year and perhaps I feel a bit guilty because I’m so deliriously happy and we lost pretty bad and I was supposed to be man-marking RonalDuy and he ended up scoring 5 more goals but that bad bad feeling goes away when I spend all day looking at my player page on the Toronto Champions League website with that glorious 1 in the goals column and sometimes I refresh the page just to make sure its still real because it seems like such a dream but and… wait a second… has somebody been reading my diary?” Callahan scored.

The Gunners vs Hulkamaniacs
Keeper Dave Ashton was determined to not give away the same gifts as Bradley “Santa” Hughes, who has now generously allowed Paul “Fighting Irish” Callahan and Fernando “Mouth from the South” Ayala to score their only goals of the season. The Gunners expected an easy matchup against the worn out Hulkamaniacs, who needed nothing short of a Christmas miracle to defeat an eight-manned Gunners squad. But it looked like it would be another routing as Dan “Boomin” Newman scored two early on, with Andrew “Fancy Pants” Winnett adding another, putting The Gunners up 3-0 at the 12 minute mark. Fed up, Cesar Vivas took over goaltending duties and Alex Orellana walked onto the pitch, determined to earn his spot on the roster. Suddenly, this routing turned into a goaltending battle as both Dave Ashton and Cesar Vivas each made several ridiculous saves to keep the score set at 3-0. With time winding down Nasim “The Dream” Zoubeiri walked in along the left touch line and tapped an easy one home, ending The Gunners shutout bid. 3-1 is how this game ended, but the promise of their two new players gives the Hulkamaniacs a ray of hope for the second half of the season.

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